Two children were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying very loudly.
2nd Child: Why are you crying?
1st Child: I came here for blood test.
2nd Child: So? Are you afraid?
1st Child: No. Not that. For the blood test, they cut my finger.
At this, the second one started crying. The first one was astonished.
1st Child: Why are you crying now?
2nd Child: I have come for my urine test!
One day on the way home from work, I stopped at the local Pharmacy and while I was checking out, I picked up some candy to take home for me and my 7-year old son. It was a bag of Gold Coins (Gold Foil-covered chocolate candy coins). There were many sizes, from dime to dollar. I took the bag home, and me and my son opened the bag and ate all of the coins, my son taking the bigger dollar-sized ones and me taking the smaller ones.
The next day, my wife, my son and I stopped at the Pharmacy again to pick up a few things. While my wife and I were shopping, we noticed that my son had picked up a Gold Coin Condom. Before we could catch him, he took it up to the counter and asked the Pharmacist, “What’s this?”
The woman, looking very serious, said, “That’s a condom, son.”
To which my son replied, “My daddy BOUGHT me some of these yesterday!”
With a disgusted look on her face, the Pharmacist replied, “Those are NOT for children, young man.”
And finally, my son replied, “Then I’ll buy this one for my Daddy. He likes the LITTLE ones!”
One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated, waiting for the cockpit crew to show up so they can get under way. The pilot and co-pilot finally appear in the rear of the plane, and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind.
The pilot is using a white cane, bumping into passengers right and left as he stumbles down the aisle, and the co-pilot is using a guide dog. Both have their eyes covered with huge sunglasses. At first the passengers don’t react, thinking that it must be some sort of practical joke. However, after a few minutes the engines start revving and the airplane starts moving.
The passengers look at each other with some uneasiness, whispering among themselves and looking desperately to the stewardesses for reassurance. Then the airplane starts accelerating rapidly down the runway and people begin panicking. Some passengers are praying, and as the plane gets closer and closer to the end of the runway, the voices are becoming more and more hysterical. Finally, when the airplane has less than 20 feet of runway left, there is a sudden change in the pitch of the shouts as everyone screams at once, and at the very last moment the airplane lifts off and is airborne.
Up in the cockpit, the co-pilot breathes a sigh of relief and turns to the pilot: “You know, one of these days the passengers aren’t going to scream, and we’re gonna get killed!”
Ok..kita mulakan dengan tag dari Rokudaime_jr
Sejak bila anda mula berpuasa penuh??
> posa ek? kecik2 lagi dah mule posa… tapi yg penuh, aku rasedarjah 4 kot… hehehehehehe….
Pernahkah anda ponteng puasa dan apakah alasannya??
> tipu ar kalo kate xpenah ponteng posa… skrg pun ada yg kantoi dah… ops… terlepas cakap lak… hehehehehe… kene kerja berat… xtahan ar…
Adakah anda pernah bermain bunga api dan mercun??
> menurut firasat aku, bunga api dan mercun nih amat mesti dimain pada bulan pose… jadi, xde sebab utk xmain… lagi kalo dpt yg bunyi kuat2… Best woo.. teringat aku time main thunder clap dgn roku time kat tanjung karang… salah aim, masuk umah orang… abis cuak sume… nasib baik umah kosong…
Juadah apakah menjadi kegemaran anda sewaktu berbuka??
> aku ni jenis yg sederhana dan xmemilih… ape yg ada atas meja, aku tibai… slalu tu murtabak dan kuih samosa yg bentuk 3segi tu aku tibai dulu… air plak, jagung dan cincau… slruuupppp….
Lagu raya manakah yang anda suka??
> lagu ek… ntah la.. mane2 yg sedap didengar, aku layan je… huhuhu…
Tahun ini anda beraya di mana??
> Rumah la…Mcm biasa..
Pernahkah anda bertugas di hari raya??
> Tak pernah lagi… awal2 dah mintak cuti seminggu…. Hahhahha…..
Apakah kenangan paling manis di hari raya??
> Dapat beraya ke rumah si dia… tapi tahun nih xtau ar dpt ke x… blom plan lagi… Hehehehe…
Sebarkan tag ini kepada 8 orang sahabat bertuah pilihan anda.
> ketuk_angel, Rokudaime_jr, Remyza, Norizam, Muznaz, Faris, Azleah, yg lain2 aku x tau nak tag sapa dah….Hehhehe…..
Apa erti Hari Raya pada korang??
> Hari raya nih bukan setakat meraikan kemenangan umat Islam setelah berpuasa selama sebulan… tapi masa utk melawat sanak saudara yg xpenah nak datang umah aku, bermaaf-maafan, dan yang penting sekali, kumpul duit raye… hahahahaha…
Apa yang wajib korang buat bila Hari Raya Menjelma
> Bangun2 pagi raye tu, solat subuh dulu kalo sempat… pastu pi solat sunat ari raye… balik dari masjid, makan2 dulu… pastu baru mintak maap kat parents… kalo mintak maap dulu, kang xde selera lak nak mkn ketupat… huhuhuhuhu….
Pernah tak korang rasai Malam Lailatul Qadar??
> Blom pernah… tiap2 tahun aku bersedia utk kdatangan malam tu… tapi xde gak… xpe la… dapat buat solat sunat taubat dan solat sunat tasbih kat masjid….
Bape Banyak Duit Raya pernah korang dapat??
> tahun lepas aku dapat dlm rm350 kalo xsilap… tahun nih, xtau ar… kalo dapat, aku amik je… hehehehehe….
Kuih ape paling korang Suke Makan Masa Hari Raya??
> Kuih tat ngan Kuih gajus ke jagus… dapat kerepek pun ok gak…
Letak gambar kenangan korang Masa Raya yang tak dapat dilupakan
> Raye yg xdapat dilupakan? ada ke? cth camne? ada kematian ke?
Sebarkan tag ni kepada 2 orang rakan anda.
> Remyza ngan ketuk_angel
One dark night outside a small town, a fire started inside the local chemical plant. Before long it exploded into flames and an alarm went out to fire departments from miles around. After fighting the fire for over an hour, the chemical company president approached the fire chief and said, “All of our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved! I will give $50,000 to the engine company that brings them out safely!”
As soon as the chief heard this, he ordered the firemen to strengthen their attack on the blaze. After two more hours of attacking the fire, president of the company offered $100,000 to the engine company that could bring out the company’s secret files. From the distance a long siren was heard and another fire truck came into sight. It was a local volunteer fire company composed entirely of men over 65.
To everyone’s amazement the little fire engine raced through the chemical plant gates and drove straight into the middle of the inferno. In the distance the other firemen watched as the old timers hopped off of their rig and began to fight the fire with an effort that they had never seen before.
After an hour of intense fighting the volunteer company had extinguished the fire and saved the secret formulas. Joyous, the chemical company president announced that he would double the reward to $200,000 and walked over to personally thank each of the volunteers. After thanking each of the old men individually, the president asked the group what they intended to do with the reward money. The fire truck driver looked him right in the eye and said, “The first thing we’re going to do is fix the dang brakes on that truck!”
Three engineers and three accountants were traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each bought tickets and watched as the three engineers bought only one ticket. “How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?” asked an accountant.”Watch and you’ll see”, answered an engineer.
They all boarded the train. The accountants took their respective seats, but the three engineers all crammed into a rest room and closed the door behind them. Shortly after the train departed, the conductor came around collecting tickets. He knocked on the restroom door and said, “Ticket, please”. The door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand. The conductor took it and moved on. The accountants saw this and agreed it was a quite clever idea.
So, after the conference, the accountants decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money (being clever with money, and all that). When they got to the station, they bought a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers didn’t buy a ticket at all. “How are you going to ride without a ticket”? said one perplexed accountant.”Watch and you’ll see”, answered an engineer. When they boarded the train, the three accountants crammed into a restroom and the three engineers crammed into another one nearby. The train departed. Shortly afterward, one of the engineers left his restroom and walked over to the restroom where the accountants were hiding.
He knocked on the door and said, “Ticket, please”.
